The end of this cycle

Every so often we have the opportunity to reflect on life and see what we have made of it, where we are at with it, and where we want to take it next. This past year has been one that will undoubtedly go down in the books as another good one, but it will also be one when looking back that will be remembered as a pivotal year for life changes.

2010 started off with a short exploration of a new culture in Peru. I had the gracious opportunity to travel with two great friends to an unknown land to me. Not only was the opportunity to visit fantastic, but the people I traveled with and the people I met there will remain in my soul and heart for ever. Bringing in the new year in Cusco with our friends the Argentinians, Peruvians and all the other strangers from around the world was a moment not to forget, and not just because we were in a foreign land.

Over the course of the year Santa Barbara, CA started becoming more and more like home. Having been away from CA for 5 years and not living anywhere for more than 11 months (London) I started to get the itch to leave Santa Barbara at around the year mark. This worked in an opposite form. I started gaining more responsibility at work, I started becoming comfortable with my living situation and I was settling into the neighborhood (i.e Melrose Place). How could I leave?

Mid year 2010 I had a roommate swap. Barbara moved out and Mike moved in. Change is good and nothing in life is constant nor forever. Summer for Melrose Place was themed "Slut it Up!" and although there was very, very little of anything related to the theme going on, at least for me- I felt as though the summer months were all a vacation with good friends on a seaside town... game nights, dinner parties, spontaneous adventures, hikes, and ultimately good memories.

As work continued to pick up steam, my role continued to develop to set me up towards acquiring more responsibility towards year-end. During the third quarter of the year a time of intensive reflection came upon me. That is when this blog became more prevalent, when I injured my knee during my marathon training and when yoga became a common thread in my life. This has allowed to be more intentional with life and my actions. It has allowed me to explore me and really get to know Javier Moreno a whole lot better. Things are shaping up. I dont think I know every bit of me yet, but I sure am working hard at doing so.


This brings me to present day and I continue to be in love with my life. Many people have commented that they wish they had my life and I would question back, "why?". Im starting to come to terms with the fact that I do lead a pretty darn good life. I have great family and friends. I have a great job and great co-workers. I live in a beautiful city. I enjoy good food and drink. Above all else, I realize that I am happy with life as a whole and that allows me to enjoy the present day so much more. I still have a lot of reality to come to terms with and a lot of excavating of myself.

For this very reason of wanting to find out more I am setting myself up with a few resolutions for the new year.

1. I will be more intentional and authentic in my actions
2. I will reflect on my daily activity through this blog and other means
3. I will get to know my subconscious self and start to visit with my dreams
4. I will assess my career and career path more holistically
5. I will be more conscious about what goes into my body
6. I will be more conscious about the environmental impact I have on the world and aim to influence others to do the same
7. I will connect with old friends and write more letters to mail to them
8. Most importantly, I will strive to maintain happiness day in and day out.

I am well aware that sometimes things don't work out as planned, and in those cases it's rolling with the punches. Everything happens for a reason and its about accepting truth and reality with arms wide open.

2011 will be a good year and I look forward to the growth that will happen in the years ahead.


Happy New Year.

Jm

When change happens...

Recently I have found myself surrounded by change. Loose change in my pockets, the leaves on trees starting to change slightly in color, co-workers being let go, my little sister getting engaged, getting to know myself better through exploring that which I connect with, watching and feeling the weather get cooler... it's all relevant change.

It is when this change happens and how we react to it that makes a big difference. I spoke to my father this evening and after a little while of shooting the shit we were about to hang-up and then I interrupted with an inquiry as to his feelings regarding the recent engagement. Now my father has never really been one to show emotion. I can count on my fingers the number of times I have really seen the emotional heart of my dad. His response to my question resembled his common state of being: neutral. I pushed him to expose himself a bit. I want to see him really be into what he was thinking, but he digressed.

We all make decisions to not fully involve ourselves in life experiences to our full extent, if we did pour all of our energy, heart and soul into everything we did every single day, either we would be extremely drained and really tired, or we would need to slow WAY down. Nonetheless, my feeling is that in this "fast paced" life many of us live in (whether we want to or not) we have to choose our battles. Change is happening all around us, every second of the day and what we choose to focus on should provide a sense of savoring. It was said to me recently, "Those who have the ability to savor lead the happiest lives." Savor those moments that you are confronted with, both positive and negative. Its the balance of both that will allow a forward trajectory.

I will most likely re-visit the topic with my dad. I'll just have to find the right way to approach it to make it positive for both of us. After all change is good and learning to include and digest the emotions that come with change will make us that much better.

be silent, be still....

"shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"

Over the last few days, maybe even week- I have been in quiet mode. Not that I am going around "shushing" other people, but I have more or less done that to myself. While all the noise is going on around me, I have taken a step back and listened. Not that I do not want to be part of the noise, but I want to be observant of the noise. This is the noise happens around us all the time and sometimes we choose to be part of it and sometimes we choose to ignore it, but rarely do we choose to observe it from a third party perspective. I have appreciated doing this over the last few days.

The noise around us is telling of who we are as individuals. What kind of environment do we surround our selves by? How can we harness the noise, and become one with it, to allow us a leap to our next endeavor? These are the curious questions that have come about from observing the noise. This noise has taken various forms... rain drops, car alarms, peoples footsteps, t.v. commercials and sirens, to name a few. The noise takes different shapes and sizes. What do they all mean and why are these noises happening, both independently and collectively?



This period of quiet time has started this wave of observation for me... and in a simple way I am learning more about me and tuning into the noises that I myself produce. My noises are not all pleasant, but the truth is I have to know about them for myself and address them from there.

At the end of the day, if when being observant the outcome is a pleasant listen of a light rainfall on the trees outside ones window... then consider that a win.